On Doing What I Want

I recently returned from a five-night cruise vacation with Virgin Voyages, and I’m still getting comfortable with telling people that. Not only do cruises have uncool reputations of uncultured overconsumption, often at the expense of economically suppressed port towns, they are also very unsustainable. They burn tons of fuel, their all-you-can-eat policies create massive food waste, and they are a large source of the single use plastic that scourge the same seas they sail on. But this ain’t your grandmother’s cruise ship, and here’s why:

Virgin Voyage’s purpose is to make an “epic sea change”, including an impressive sustainability plan and a net zero by 2050 pledge. They use heat from the engines to power all the ship’s electric needs. They have a LEED Gold terminal building. They have initiatives for energy efficiency, water conservation, and food waste reduction. There’s no single use plastic on board (None! It was incredible!) The TP in the bathrooms is made from agricultural waste bi-product. I even did a sustainability tour of the onboard shops, and it was mostly not greenwashing (just because something is organic doesn’t make it “compostable”, ya’ll….)

One might argue that Richard Branson could have made a more epic impact by not creating a cruise line at all. This would be in line with the Degrowth movement: that to avoid the predicted environmental catastrophes, we must reduce our production and consumption in the global north. From a degrowth perspective, Branson’s money should have gone directly to existing projects that reduce current impacts on the environment, instead of being used creating more impact with a lower footprint.

While Virgin might be inducing demand for cruise vacations from people like me, almost everyone I met on board were already self-identified “cruise people”. And everyone I met said they love Virgin Voyages and they will sail “the Virgin way” from now on. Beyond converting cruise goers to a more sustainable ship, Virgin says that 50% of sailors go home inspired to live more sustainability after a cruise with them. This shift in demand will likely force other cruise lines to get with the program and take steps toward a lower carbon footprint and less waste, if they aren’t already heading that way. That would reflect conscious capitalism, which prioritizes sustainability within the pursuit of creating more financial wealth.

As I was pondering of the pros and cons of degrowth verses conscious capitalism on my vacation, I was also reading a New Yorker piece on Bertrand Piccard and his quest for solar powered flight. He is the son of Jacques Piccard, who piloted a submarine to the deepest point on Earth in 1960, and the grandson of August Piccard, who in 1931 traveled higher in the sky than anyone before. And yes, for the Star Trek fans out there: the family is the namesake of Jean Luc.

Bertrand Picard’s foundation, Solar Impulse, is reframing sustainability in terms of profit and job creation, in line with conscious capitalism. The article juxtaposes Bertrand’s practicality with his grandfather’s purity and his father’s “tortured idealism”, which left him bitter toward humanity for our ecological depredations, according to Bertrand as quoted in the article.

The author Ben Taub writes, “For Piccard, the goal is to be ‘more practical, more realistic’ in his ecological pursuits than his father was; in a recent debate with someone he later described as a ‘green fundamentalist,’ he said, ‘You try to achieve everything, with the great risk of achieving nothing. I may be trying to reach only halfway—but I think I will get there.’”

I read this and thought, “I’m not so sure about that…” While I think that it is possible to transition our economy to a sustainable and just circular system, I worry we do not have the time or the critical mass to do so. This pessimism may be influenced by my current reading of the Ministry for the Future, a novel in which a heat wave in the not too distant future has just killed 20 million people.

And yet, there I was, on a cruise ship. I am ok with this cognitive dissonance. Like it or not, we live in a capitalist, consumer-driven society. Without revolution, war, or other drastic change, evolution is our path forward. This is the evolution that folks like Richard Branson, Bertrand Piccard, and John Mackey, CEO of Whole Foods and co-founder of the Conscious Capitalism non-profit, are fueling.

I can do my part to support the degrowth movement while also participating in conscious capitalism. I am not going to stop flying, but I am taking fewer flights than before. I will continue eating plant based foods, but will prioritize calories and nutrition when vegan options are poor. I can reduce my consumption as much as possible through buying secondhand clothes, keeping my electronics w/out trading in for newer generations, and forgoing all holiday gift giving, but I will still be an American with incredible privilege to consume in ways unimaginable to billions of people worldwide.

I could shun my privilege and become like that guy from the TV show the Good Place, who lives off grid and only eats radishes. But, spoiler alert, even he’s not headed to the Good Place. So, at what point do I decide to take advantage of my privilege, consume more than others, and have an outsized impact on the environment?

When I want to.

“Because I want to” is a valid reason. That is especially hard to wrap your mind around for those of us socialized as women, given we’ve been taught to put others’ needs and wants first, often at the expense of our own. And by being acutely aware of the climate crisis, acting selfishly seems to go against the equity, justice, and sustainability we strive for. But it doesn’t have to.

Through coaching, I learned to allow myself to pursue what I want. I also learned how to understand my reasons for wanting something and to assess whether I liked those reasons or not. This allowed me to navigate what I want with kindness, consideration, and compassion for others and myself. With practice, I began to trust myself that what I want is in alignment with my values.

Many environmentalists I have met want to live in alignment with their values, and maybe this is true for you too. But full alignment 100% of the time is not feasible. That’s what left Jacques Piccard tortured and the radish guy from the Good Place terrified. Because even if you were to achieve a zero waste lifestyle, or subsist only on the electricity you generated with your solar panels, or never flew anywhere else again, you may still experience unpleasant feelings like guilt, shame, and anxiety about some other aspect of your life.

Accepting that what we want may conflict with our environmental impact goals and allowing the feeling of dissonance will lessen those unpleasant feelings. Without the guilt, shame, and anxiety, you can think more clearly about when to pursue what you want, and when what you want is not worth the compromise in values.

For example, while I’m all about water conservation when it comes to taps, faucets, and fire hydrants, I love going to Korean spas and water parks. The joy I get from these water-intensive activities is high, and my impact from abstaining from them is low (Spa Castle will keep the tap on without me). But no matter how much I love eating sushi, smoked salmon, and tuna salad, I abstain from eating fish due to the inhumane treatment of fish. I know this abstinence will have little to no impact on the fishing industry, but the value for me to live with integrity is high.

I look forward to my next Virgin Voyage in 2024: a transatlantic cruise where I’ll get to spend days on end watching the beautiful ocean go by. And in the meantime, I will continue to coach myself on pursuing what I want in a way that reflects my values.

If you’re struggling with living in alignment with your values, or where you fall on the degrowth vs conscious capitalism spectrum, I can help. Book a free call where we can discuss how coaching can help you live more peacefully in today’s modern age.